Hurt People Hurt People

by | Oct 8, 2020 | Life Lectures, TME Mentoring | 148 comments

supermum,responsibility of being a woman

Dear ones, 

“Hurt people hurt other people.” 

The first time I used the above sentence was many years ago, in an English class. I was trying to explain to my students that some times we use the same word both as a verb and as a noun. 
They are the same word, spelt exactly the same way, pronounced the same way, with almost the same meaning but with different functions…

When I finished that class, I overheard some students saying what a complex and terrible language the English Language is. (I tend to agree)
But, I also overheard another group discussing how well I explained things… (the best compliment any teacher/lecturer/trainer could ever get) and what a great teacher I was. (I also tend to agree!) 
However, after I got home, that sentence continued to ring in my ears. 
“Hurt people hurt people.” 
I took pen to paper and wrote down a few things that came to my mind as I reflected on it. 

And today, I’d like to share some of them with with you. 

You see, people will hurt you. There’s no running away from that. Even nice people. People who truly love you will sometimes unintentionally and unwittingly hurt you. 
People who don’t know you will hurt you. And people who can’t stand your guts will hurt you. 
Hurt will happen. 

But, when you have been hurt by another (and indeed in the face of all of whatever life brings your way), the most important thing about that experience will always be how you respond. What you do with the emotion you feel when faced with difficulties. 

My Mum drummed this into our ears. She’d repeatedly tell us that it was not not happened to us that will matter in the end, but rather, how we responded. She used to say when the story of any incident is told, people most often started the conversation with how someone responded to something, before they talk about what triggered the respond (if ever they do).
So, this a call and a reminder, to you: to look back and identify where you’ve been hurt. Identify where you’ve been stressed. Identify where you are bleeding or where you’ve bled.

Then ensure you find healing. 
Heal. 
Find rest. 
Yes, rest. 
Because stressed people also stress other people. 
No matter how hard it is for you, let go of that hurt. Free yourself from the clutches of the heartbreak or disappointment you’ve suffered, and from any negative emotions that all of it might bring. 

Hurt people become suspicious of everyone else. 
They lash out far too quickly. 
They become jumpy and grumpy. 
They jump to conclusions even before the person in front of them have finished their sentence. 
Hurt people crawl into a shell, probably trying to protect themselves, but what they end up doing is to alienate good from their lives. 
Some will bottle up the bad, and this will continue to expand until they explode and hurt someone else. 

Yes, many hurt people are holding on to their trauma and passing it around as culture or tradition.

Do not be one of such.

Heal.

Most people are walking around with tons and tons of hurt and you never know the day they’ll explode… if you happen to be around them, they’ll hurt you. Not minding whether you deserve it or not. No matter how much you love them or how much they love you. 

Remember: “hurt people hurt people!”

You can put a stop to it this year and you must! 
Take that hurt and betrayal you’ve felt and drop it at the feet of Jesus. 

Release it. Heal. Let it go.

Take up love and joy in your heart and spread same to the world around you. 
Be slow to anger. And even slower to judge or jump to conclusions about anything and anyone. 

Be quick to forgive. 
Be quick to think about others with kindness and compassion. 
Do not pay back evil with evil. 
And do not extend to another the wrong treatment that someone might have meted out to you! 

You can hurt and not hurt others. The only way is to remind yourself never to relate to the people in your life based on temporal feelings….
And also to remind yourself that the only emotions that should take up permanent residence in your life must be; love, peace, joy, compassion, kindness and grace. 

If you’re anything like me, you are ready to keep soaring! 

I love you always, 
#TheMotherEagle

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